Beauty 4 Ashes

The Light of the World!

2011-12-24T18:48:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas! Today we light the 5^th and final candle of Advent. This candle represents Jesus himself; the Son of God, Immanuel (God with us), the One True Light who has come to bring light to our hearts. The gift of God’s Son offers hope, love, joy and peace. He is the author of all things and the fulfillment of all things.

What a Glorious moment when Jesus entered the world. The Holy King of Heaven made flesh! I’ve often wondered what it would’ve been like to have been there. Oh what a miraculous moment! Everything changed that day!

My prayer today is that you will embrace the promise of God’s Son. That this event will be more than just a cute story about a baby born in a manger with cuddly little animals and that this event won’t just be part of your Christmas celebration, but will be the very reason why you celebrate. Jesus came to redeem God’s creation and you and I are a part of that. God loves you like no one else can. He not only came into his world, but he also died and was resurrected for our redemption and salvation. We can now experience “life to the full” when we receive Christ in our hearts. If you have a few moments today, stop and listen to a few of the old Christmas hymns. They tell of this wonderful redemption story. I would like to share my favorite Christmas Song with you. Enjoy!

Oh Holy Night

http://youtu.be/4Zh-yR0pbmU

He is a gift for EVERYONE and in Him are hope, love, joy and peace. Merry Christmas!

Week 4 of Advent- Peace

2011-12-20T17:59:00.000-08:00

Week 4 and candle 4 represent peace. The light of the angels reminds us of the Peace that God gives us in Christ.

Peace can mean many different things. At Christmas time, we often hear the words “Peace on Earth,” in songs, on holiday décor and written on many Christmas cards. This phrase came from the verse in Luke 2 that says: "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!" I’ve been thinking a lot about the phrase, “Peace on Earth.” What’s its actual meaning? What do most of us actually think about this phrase when we hear it? Peace with others is important. World peace, or cooperation between nations sounds wonderful (and I long for the day when this is the case), but the peace that the angels proclaimed is peace with God through His Son Jesus.

When sin entered the world, our relationship with God (the way He had intended it) became fractured. The fellowship between man and God from that moment on (and up until the present) looks much different than when Adam and Eve walked with God in the cool of the day. They had no distractions, they didn’t have a world that was full of sin at every turn, and in their hearts they were completely pure and whole. Much changed for Adam and Eve after that tragic day. That moment in history has had regrettable consequences for the rest of us as well.

Since the Fall of man, humanity has had a frustrated, and at times, very difficult relationship with God. Even as God revealed Himself in different ways (like in the giving of the law) our own desire to live for ourselves became self-evident. For example, in the reality that none could keep the law completely. Even in all of Israel’s sacrifices and offerings, God found no pleasure. Why? It wasn’t what He had desired for those who served Him. God was (and still) looking for a clean and contrite hearts. How was that even possible in our own strength and ability? It isn’t! That’s good news, too. God in His tender love and mercy has a plan that makes peace with Him (and with our selves) possible.

The story of Christmas is one that is full of hope, love, joy and peace. Jesus gives us access to them by entering His creation as a human. The prophet who told of the birth of Jesus said that he would be called the “Prince of Peace.” God once again, came to draw men to Himself so that He could fellowship with them. Peace with God is completely amazing and transcends understanding. Many long for real lasting peace. The only way to have the peace the angels spoke of is to know the Prince of Peace.

Peace with God also allows opportunity to have peace with one another. It also allows us to have peace no matter what life brings. I pray this Christmas that each one of you will experience this amazing peace. Peace is for all on whom His favor rests. Receive this gift of peace!

Week 3 of Advent- JOY

2011-12-15T08:36:00.000-08:00

Week 3 and Candle 3 represent joy. The light of the Shepherds reminds us not to be afraid but to be joyful.

I’ve been thinking a lot this week about joy, what it is, and maybe more importantly, what it isn’t. What does it mean for someone to possess joy and how can someone obtain it? Many would say that having joy means one considers themselves happy. As I’ve been thinking about it, I would have to graciously disagree, at least when speaking about the type of joy that is talked about in scripture.

As I was looking at definitions for happiness, I found that happiness seems to depend on one’s contentment, pleasure, delight and satisfaction in the now. Whether that is by possessions, good fortune, attaining what seems good or even in those we love. Happiness is a great feeling to have, but it can also fade very quickly. Things come up, life happens, bad things take place, people hurt us and the happiness is gone as quick as it came. I’m sure almost all people desire to be happy. I love to be happy! But happiness doesn’t seem to be enough does it?

Joy however, seems to be much bigger and definitely better. From my own experience, I can say that when my world has been crashing in around me, when I’ve been heart broken and happiness is far, far away, I’ve still have joy. How? Because joy isn’t dependent on circumstances or people but on Love. I’m talking about perfect love, which is given to all who need and desire it by God! Joy isn’t a fleeting feeling but a gift that is solid, hopeful and lasting because the peace of God sustains it. It is a glorious thing!

Like I said, Joy is a gift! God offers Joy to all in the gift of His Son Jesus.

Luke 2:8-10 says,

“And in that region there were shepherds out in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with fear. And the angel said to them, "Be not afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will come to all the people.”

We’ve all hear it said this time of year that it is better to give than to receive. The reality is that God is calling all of us to receive His gift. The first Christmas was about God offering us a gift of hope, love, joy and peace. The gift’s name was, and still is, Jesus. I pray that this Christmas, you will know God’s great joy and gladly receive it.

Week 2 of Advent- LOVE

2011-12-12T04:36:00.000-08:00

Week 2 and Candle 2 of Advent represents love. The light of Bethlehem reminds us of God’s Love. We know from the first candle lit that the hope of the prophecies was fulfilled in Jesus. The nation of Israel had waited hundreds of years for their Messiah to come, yet, when He did, many missed it completely. They were expecting it to look very different, even the though the prophesies has been quite clear.

God had smuggled Himself into our world as a baby in the most humblest way. Born in a smelly stable with a bunch of animals, perhaps and most likely, on a bed of hay and dirt. Yet, we should be awe struck at the events that took place there, as well before hand and even in the events that would follow. It was a miraculous event! Here are some of the highlights: An announcement from an angel who told the virgin pledged to married that she would be with child, and that He would be called the Son of God, a dream for her husband to be not to divorce her because she was pregnant, this young man who would raise Jesus like a son, letting him know that this was indeed God doing. Imagine a heavenly host appearing to a bunch of lowly shepherds on a hillside proclaiming the birth of the King of Heaven. Visitors from the east, who had followed a bright and glorious light, are able to find the new born King, and worship him. They present the child with gifts of gold (a symbol of royalty) for the King of Kings, frankincense (symbolic of a priest) for the Great High Priest, and myrrh (a symbol of sacrifice) for the one who would give his life as a sacrifice for all. Then, another dream, but this time as a warning. God tells Joseph to lead this little family to Egypt to escape the mad power play of an illegitimate king. What an amazing Story!

So what does this have to do with love? Everything! First, we begin understand that God’s ways are not our own. The way He orchestrated this event was so timely and detailed, only God Himself could pull it off. It was unlike any of the ways we might think of doing it. What many of God’s people (Israel) didn’t realize was that God’s arrival was for something much bigger and greater than just to save a nation, He was coming to redeem all of His creation! Why? Because at the fall of man, God’s design and even desire for what He had made and loved had become corrupt and broken. But even when the Fall took place, God declared His promise of redemption (Genesis 3). This story is the fulfillment of that promise. The reason: His Love!

God’s love is written all over this story! This event took place for the benefit of ALL people for all time. He didn’t send the heavenly hosts to the temple where the supposedly “religious” people were. He didn’t send them to proclaim it to Joseph & Mary’s relatives and close friends. He didn’t even send the angels to the town in which Mary and Joseph came from. He sent the heavenly host to a bunch of shepherds on a hillside far from home. Why? Because God love and salvation to all is for everyone, no matter who you are, what you do or where you’ve been.

Luke 2:10-11

“But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for ALL people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is the Messiah, the Lord.”

Then, we have the Magi (also known as the Wise men), you know, the ones who presented the gifts to Jesus. How did they know this event would take place other than God had been speaking to them? He led them from a very far place by a great light, to the one who is Light himself. Why would God choose them? God didn’t just love the people of Israel, but ALL people, from every tribe and nation.

Finally, we see God telling Joseph to take Mary and Jesus to Egypt because Herod ordered all the baby boys of Bethlehem to be put to death. God’s salvation was for the entire world, and he would not allow for His plan of salvation to falter. Herod had selfish things in mind. What God had (and still has) in mind is for the benefit of all of creation. Even in the midst of evil, God’s love prevails.

I pray that as we celebrate this season, God’s love is loud and clear. If you are in a place where you are hurting, lonely, hopeless and overwhelmed, I pray that you would especially know that God’s perfect love is for you! God is love. An important reminder for all of us to remember during this Advent season, especially when all of our attention can turn towards other, less important things.

Week 1 of Advent- HOPE

2011-12-04T19:56:00.000-08:00

Week 1 and candle 1 of Advent represent Hope, The light of the prophets reminds us of the hope that God gives us on the way to Bethlehem. The promised Messiah would come. For hundreds of years the prophets had told of the coming Messiah. He was the hope for Israel and they were waiting and hoping in anticipation!

Micah 5:2

“But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are of old, from ancient times.”

------

Isaiah 7:14

“Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.”

------

Isaiah 9:2

“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness, on them has light shined.”

God’s plan was much bigger and better than what many had hoped for. The Messiah would not only one day rule the nations, but He was coming to bind up the brokenhearted, free the captives, release prisoners from darkness, comfort all who mourn, give joy instead of despair and grant salvation! God was coming in flesh to redeem His creation!

I’m grateful today for what God has fulfilled (and continues to fulfill) in my life. He has healed my broken heart more than once, He has set me free from sin and darkness (it is complete, as well as a continual work), He has been my comfort and His Joy is my strength. The LORD is my salvation! My prayer for those who don’t know God in this way is that one day, they will. Advent is a time to reflect and admit our need for God’s perfect love! If anyone is need of hope, healing, freedom and salvation, in Jesus, it is offered freely to you.

For those who already have this hope, celebrate it! Keep your eyes on Him, being hopeful with anticipation, awaiting His coming. Let’s not grow tired in doing what is good, always remember what God and His Kingdom is all about. He will return and make all things right! That is a real and glorious hope, a gift for the entire world.

Hebrews 11:1 says,

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”

Advent-An Important Christmas Tradition!

2011-12-03T14:12:00.000-08:00

For the past few Christmas Seasons, our family has participated in Advent with our church. This year we are celebrating it as a family here at home as well. I’m surprised that in the tradition that Mario and I grew up in, and in a few of the major Christian denominations, that Advent was never part of the Christmas celebration. So many of you, whether a Christian or not, may be asking what Advent actually is. Here is a small description from the website that we are using for Advent here at home.

http://www.pghpresbytery.org/news/pdfs/advent_devotional.pdf

What is Advent?

The season of Advent is a time when individuals prepare their hearts to receive Christ. Advent refers to the “coming” or “arrival” of Jesus Christ. The first Sunday of Advent occurs near or upon November 30 each year. It always includes four Sundays and varies in length from twenty-two to twenty-eight days. Advent ends with Christmas Eve.

Advent can be celebrated at church and at home. This celebration can include singing a carol, reading scripture, praying, and a brief devotional reading.

Advent, for us, has become a season to really focus on why, Immanuel, God with us, came to earth. In addition, we can reflect on the miracle that it was (and still is) and what that means for us who have placed our hope in Him. What Christmas is truly about and the hope for the future?

Each Sunday there is a candle to be lit (each with an important meaning) and a devotional to be read (whether a scripture or encouraging word). Some Sunday’s even come with activities for the day or even the week. The color of the candles which are usually 3 purple and 1 pink (sometimes blue is used instead) represents Christ’s royalty. There is one last (white) candle lit on Christmas Eve representing the One True Light. The Advent wreath that holds each of the candles is decorated with greenery. God’s everlasting love is symbolized in the circle of the wreath and the evergreen symbolized Christ’s gift of eternal life.

Advent is an amazing way to slow down, spend time as a family and prepare our hearts for not only what God has provided on the first Christmas but in anticipation for what He will do in the future.

So during this season, I’m going to blog each week on Advent, the meanings of the candles that we light each week the lessons we’ve learned. I hope we will all be reminded, even in the business of this season, what is it truly all about.

Blessed Beyond Measure!

2011-11-23T07:42:00.000-08:00

I’m taking a little break on blogging on forgiveness. Well, not really, because I’m learning many lessons right now on forgiveness, so I do have a lot I’d like to write about. I am still reflecting (that is why I haven’t blogged in a good while) on what I am learning. In the mean time, being this time of year, I really wanted to take the opportunity to express how thankful I truly am.

A few weeks ago, the kids and I made a large turkey out of poster board and hung it in on the wall in our stairway. Then we made feathers that we’ve been adding to our turkey’s body until Thanksgiving. Each day, I have been writing down what my children are thankful for on the feathers and adding it to the wall. It has been so neat to see the BIG things they are grateful for, as well as the simple, everyday things that seem so small. You know, the things that we can just take for granted. It has been a real challenge to me personally to be thankful in the same ways.

As I’ve taken the time to thank God for His complete goodness and provision towards me, the words that come to mind are, “blessed beyond measure.” There is no other way to put it! I couldn’t even list all blessings that I have been given personally, as a daughter, sister, friend, wife and mother. Realizing that I am blessed beyond measure has been a huge lesson for me. It seems to put things into the right perspective. I often find myself looking at the things that I don’t have, the things that I think I need, and the things that I want rather than what I have already been given.

So today, I want to say, “Thank you GOD for everything!”

Thank you God for who you are and for all that you offer me. I would not know true life, true love and truth itself without you. Thank you for hope and peace that passes all my understanding and grace that I don’t deserve.

I’m thankful for my husband who selflessly loves me and gives so much of himself. For being my best friend and for the way he pushes me to know all the more, who God is, and who He created me to be.

I’m thankful for my little priceless treasures, my kids! They give me so much joy and love. They teach me so much about life and what truly matters.

I’m thankful for my family both near and far. Especially my parents, who have cared for me since birth, loved me in good and bad times and instilled in me many great things.

I’m thankful for friends especially those who are close and have been an encouragement and poured into me as I walk this journey. I consider my friendships among the big things I’m most grateful for. Thank you!

I’m also grateful for the everyday, temporary stuff. I’m thankful for our home, vehicles, food, clothing, and as Brayden once said, “our table”. There is so much to be thankful for in the everyday. All made possible by the Lord!

Thank you God!

I pray you all have a very Happy Thanksgiving. Don’t forget to give thanks and count your own blessings and know where they came from. You will be amazed when you do!

1 Chronicles 29:11-13

"Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power

and the glory and the majesty and the splendor,

for everything in heaven and earth is Yours.

Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom;

You are exalted as head over all. Wealth and honor come from You;   You are the ruler of all things.  In Your hands are strength and

power  to exalt and give strength to all.  Now, our God, we give You

thanks, and praise Your glorious name."

Do Justice and Forgiveness Work Together?

2011-10-03T09:58:00.000-07:00

Many of my thoughts over the past few months or so have been on justice. How many of you have watched the nightly news and seen horrific stories about people being victimized, harmed and even killed? It is absolutely heartbreaking! How many of you have seen a loved one treated in such a horrific way? Maybe even you have been that victim or even still are. So here is the problem I have been wrestling with, how can justice and forgiveness work together? Is it even possible? I want to be a forgiving person but I also want justice especially when it comes to those I love and have seen abused. Most of the time if I could be honest, I would like those who have caused such pain to feel that very hurt and then some. I’d like for them to have the payment due to them, to be punished. How is it that so many here in America and in other parts of the world get away with causing such destruction? Some never pay anything for what they’ve done. This is a hard, hard reality. This whole justice thing is a difficult one and I find it all the more difficult when forgiveness is involved. As I was praying about it, I was reminded of some very important things;

- Most people long for justice not because we are good in ourselves, but because we were made in the image of the One who is just. God’s character means he always acts in a way that is just and granting justice is an extension of his character. We should long and work for justice and most of us do. Whether you are a believer or not, most of us long for things to be right. We hate being hurt, we hate others being hurt, we long for something better, and we long for justice. This is the reason why!

- Justice is better given by someone who is just (one who is guided by truth (or in fact is truth) and whom is righteous). I don’t know about you, but I would not consider myself just. I have been forgiven and justified (because of Jesus love and sacrifice for me) but I am still in a process of being made right. So the way I carry out justice may not always be just or right even if that is my intention. I am grateful for those who lead in government, church and other areas of life, but even when justice is trying to be served, it can be very flawed.

- It is humanly impossible to carry out complete justice? We are not all knowing, so there are always things we do not see (details, the entire story, motives, what has been hidden).

- There is perfect timing for prefect and complete justice to be carried out. I don’t know about you, but I’m a little bit impatient with this. I want it to happen now. I’m learning that it doesn’t always work as fast as I want it or in the way that I want it. God justice is already at work but I believe we will see it all the more when Jesus returns.

-GOD is the only one who can bring complete justice because He is the righteous, merciful and gracious judge. He allows many an opportunity for repentance. He is all knowing which means when he does carry out justice, He will be 100% fair and right. His timing is spot on! Don’t be mistaken, that day will come, but God in His infinite love, is giving time to everyone to ask for forgiveness and turn our hearts toward Him.

So has my question be answered? Is it possible for forgiveness and justice to work together? Absolutely yes! Seeing God’s plan shows me the answer is a big YES! God will carry out justice in the most perfect way, but today is the day of the LORD’s favor. Today He offers forgiveness. His arms are opened for anyone who genuinely comes to Him for it, no matter what the crime.

So what am I to do? What are we all to do? Forgive! God says if we don’t forgive, we will not be forgiven. There is a lot at stake here, and there a lot of questions that I still have, but we will work through these together. So many times, I’ve wanted swift judgment for others, but mercy, grace and definitely forgiveness for myself. It doesn’t work this way. I must be forgiving and gracious to others who are seeking and needing it. I must be merciful and I must trust God to carry out justice in His perfect way and timing!

In part 2 of this blog I will be sharing a true story of a young woman who forgave the man that destroyed her family. How only in God’s strength was this made possible. It’s a journey I’m sure that she would never want to relive, a journey where justice was the cry of her heart and a journey that brought her healing.

Forgiveness: A Healthy Choice

2011-09-09T11:21:00.000-07:00

Forgiveness: to grant free pardon and give up all claim on account of an offense, a difference or mistake.

Time to take another stab at this forgiveness thing. Funny how when I started thinking and studying on the subject of forgiveness, I have found more opportunities to put it into practice. (Both in asking for it myself as well as granting it to others). Such is life. Did you noticed how I said, "put it into practice?" Forgiveness really is a practice or choice. If you notice in the definition above, it is something we grant, we give up all claims or rights. It requires an action on our part. I found a few other definitions that talk about forgiveness that I'd like to share as well:

-to pardon somebody for a mistake

-excuse a misunderstanding or wrong doing,

-to grant relief from payment or to forgive a debt.

In all of these definitions, we are responsible for acting if we choose to forgive.

Studies show that those who forgive are much happier and much healthier than those who withhold forgiveness. The reality is those who withhold forgiveness become easily resentful, bitter, hostile, hateful and angry. I don’t know about you. but I have found those very traits displayed in my life at times and I was absolutely miserable.

It has been well documented that a person who has prolonged resentment and anger suffers a heightened range of health issues (both cardiovascular and in the nervous system) as well as emotional and mental issues. Again, I’ve recognized this in my own life. This hit very close to home for me a few years back. I was dealing with some deep pain and because I wallowed in it, bitterness took root as well as a range of other emotions and I became super ill physically. Honestly speaking, I was also emotionally and mentally ill as well. All the time I was thinking it was simply a major health issue when the reality was the physical problems were just ramifications of a much deeper issue. All this to say that I am living proof that unforgiveness, resentment, anger, hurt or whatever you want to call it, is very damaging and certainly not worth it.

As I was thinking back over the past few years and my experiences, I’m reminded of how I got through it. I have a great healer! Yes, I have the choice to forgive but I don’t have the strength or power to heal my own broken heart, to restore happiness, or even better, joy. I surely can’t make myself whole. Soon after my experience, God took me through a wonderful book called “Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul”. It truly was life changing for me. God began to reveal much more than hurt I had felt from the past few years. He began to show me the ways I’d been hurt through out my entire life, how I hadn’t let go of much of it. It was as if God was pulling back the layers of my heart and showing me that I needed to deal with the pain, unforgiveness and even the ways I had hurt others. He also helped me to understand that some wounds are so deep that forgiveness isn’t something I could accomplish alone. I needed Him to help me. He definitely knows more than anyone else how to forgive and how difficult it truly is for us. He wants us to be whole and I mean completely whole (body, mind and soul). This is a process and it will continue until Jesus is revealed, but it is a process that is for necessary for us right now. Forgiveness is an essential.

If you have some unforgiveness, I would like to encourage you to let it go and choose to forgive. Don’t live in anger and resentment, it will rob you of happiness, health and wholeness. If it seems to hard, ask God for his help as well as His healing.

Forgiveness, hard but necessary

2011-08-30T06:28:00.000-07:00

Forgiveness is something I’ve been wrestling with for quite sometime. As a believer and follower of Christ, it is essential to my faith. Forgiveness is something I have been given as a result of Christ’s sacrifice for me (as well as the entire world). It is also something that is required of me as one of God’s children. Forgiveness is also necessary to live a full and healthy life. So why in the world is forgiveness something I find so difficult at times? Is it for you?

Whatever your back ground or beliefs are, whether you are a believer or not, we’ve all been wronged and we all have a choice to forgive or to withhold forgiveness. Forgiveness is a choice and it doesn’t usually come easy. We each have a story we could tell, and some are much more painful than others, but regardless of how deep our hurt runs, forgiveness is still and will always be important. Unforgiveness can consume our thoughts, dictate our mood, steal our joy and cripple us. That is why forgiveness is necessary to live a full and healthy life. I’m seriously tired of those struggling with those types of consequences and I refuse to live that way any longer. So what choice do I have but forgive?

Sometimes forgiveness is much more of a journey than a one-time, momentous act. It’s a repeated choice. I don’t know about you but there have been times where I’ve felt that I’ve moved on and have gotten over something, but when I think about how I've been wronged or I’ll run into a particular person the feelings of hurt, anger and even bitterness rise up in me. It is in those moments that I’m reminded how difficult and how much of a process forgiving someone can be. The extremely hard thing about forgiveness is that it hardly ever equals forgetting. The way our mind works, most of the time we will not forget the event that causes so much pain and hurt.

I’ve really prayed about this process of forgiveness. I actually wanted to blog about much “better” and “easier” things, but I keep coming back to this. I know it’s because of where I’m at in life, what I’ve been through and the healing that’s taking place in me even now. Forgiveness is big and there is so much to say about it. I really feel led to write a series of blogs on this topic. I would like to talk more about why forgiveness is necessary as well as what forgiveness actually is: things like longing for justice, forgiving those who should’ve never hurt us, forgiving ourselves, why forgiveness is always possible and even experiencing the Ultimate forgiveness.

I hope you will take this journey with me and please share your own thoughts. I don’t have all the answers but I’m definitely seeking the Answer. I would love to say that I am a very forgiving person, that I never hold a grudge and that I’m always quick to forgive but that isn’t the case. I think if we are all honest, most of us struggle with that. But I am hopeful that as I journey through this, that I will come out of it much more freer to forgive.

Much like a sponge, the mind of a child

2011-07-25T15:59:00.000-07:00

The mind is an amazing thing, especially the mind of a child. It is always absorbing things, much like a sponge. I see daily how quickly my own kids learn, remember and act on things they’ve heard or seen. Of course, some of it is good and some of it not. Their minds are curious and always learning and full of many questions. They want to know about the simple things in life as well as the complex. The ability to learn, think, meditate and ponder truly is a gift God has given each one of us. Like many other things, although these are wonderful and amazing gifts, they have to be nurtured properly.

The other day, I was at my mom’s listening to the children she cares for. I’m amazed by the stuff kids know at such a young age. I’m not talking about great stuff either. How is it that a six year old (or even a three year old) is able to talk about sexuality in such a way that, if left unchallenged, would lead to a serious perversion of something beautiful? In addition, how is the value of living to be understood when gratuitous violence is consistently set before their eyes? It blows my mind and absolutely terrifies me as a mom.

I know as a parent that I can’t and won’t be able to protect my kids from all the dangers in our world, but I’m realizing all the more how much of it there is. It’s a horrible reality that as a mom, I can’t and won’t always be able to protect my kids from a fallen and sometimes very bad world. More than ever, I understand that they do have a real enemy (we all do) and that their minds are his first target. As much as I hate this truth, I know that hopelessness is not going to help my children (or anybody else’s). Turning a blind eye to it is equally tragic. So what can I do?

First, I need to understand that ultimately I cannot protect my children from this (a very hard lesson for a person that struggles with control). So then it’s hopeless right? No it isn’t! Mario and I play a very important part in protecting our children, but only the Creator Himself has the power and ability to protect our children in ways we can’t. He designed and fashioned them and He knows how they work! He is certainly aware of the enemy’s tactics. So for us, surrendering their protection over to Him is of most importance. We are seeing that praying over our kids on a daily basis is necessary.

Secondly, and this is where God holds us responsible for the precious ones He has entrusted us with, we need to be active and aware of what is set before their eyes and what they hear starting right here at home. Again, going back to the sponge analogy, kids absorb! Kids learn so much at home! Home needs to be a place of firm foundation where truth is taught and love is a reality. Our kids will learn much by how Mario and I treat each other, how we treat them and what takes place in our home. This is how a firm foundation is laid. And this is where kids should feel safe, loved and encouraged especially when the world out there tells different.

In a world with ever growing technology there is a battle we face as parents. I am not anti-TV, we actually have four in our home, but I’ve been really convicted lately over the amount my kids watch daily (especially during hot summer months), as well as the fact that even the “age appropriate” programs sometimes teach concepts that are contrary to what is right, sending a mixed message. I need to know what my kids are watching as well as its content. And just a side note, if children are watching programs/movies, listening to music, viewing things via internet or even playing games that are not “age appropriate” and/or are perverted in content, don’t be mistaken, it will effect who they are and most definitely how they view things. These are very real ways a 3 or a 6 year old I mentioned earlier can know too much. For us, our kids are young so TV is my biggest concern as far a technology, but I know that in a very short time the other things I will also need to be cautious with. I don’t think the solution in this day and age would be to rid our home of technology. It is very much apart of our world and we couldn’t escape that. It can be very helpful, as well as enjoyable, but teaching our kids the way to use it is very important.

Thirdly, when our kids are out there (talking about away from home) and we are not always with them, we should know and be aware of what is taking place. How does this happen? Communication with my kids! When Londyn jumps in the car after a day at school, I ask questions. =) She doesn’t always feel up to it, but I still ask them. Not just generic questions, but very specific ones. Who did you play with? What did you play? What did you learn? Oh really, who told you that? What did you do? How did that make you feel? Mario does the same thing; in fact he is the one who taught me how important this is. Allow me just say, it allows our kids to be open and honest, something that is very special to them. It brings me such joy to hear my kids share that they do in fact make good decisions and do some pretty wonderful things even when Daddy and Mommy aren’t there and to know that God is indeed with them even when we aren’t. What a peace!

I hope that a few of the insights I’m learning will be helpful to you. If you are a parent please be fully aware that our children are like sponges and what they soak in will eventually be squeezed out. Whatever your beliefs are, you have to know that although the mind is a wonderful thing, it needs to be protected! It isn’t just an image or a song, it is a concept being learned. If you are not a parent, you have a mind that needs some protecting as well. As I pray for God’s protection over my children, I also pray that for children everywhere and of all ages. I know how real the enemy is and the damage he causes.

Reacting to quickly! A poor excuse to be ugly.

2011-07-01T17:41:00.000-07:00

I made a decision this summer that I would increase my reading as well as purposefully spend more quality time with my kids. I'm really learning so much as I do. God is also using everyday experiences and conversations with dear friends to speak and illuminate different things to me. I'm grateful for seasons of learning, but it can be a really tough thing as well. Especially when it requires an inner transformation, like surgery on one's heart. It has been very uncomfortable (and even painful), but I know how necessary it really is. I also know God creates something beautiful of it in the end. So here I am, ready to share the lessons I'm learning. I pray that as I share with honesty and transparency that someone will be encouraged and perhaps learn something as well. As I share what God is dealing with me personally, as well as adding my own opinions and thoughts on things (especially the really hard stuff), my hope is that you'd be open and feel free to share your own experiences. Even if you feel very differently about things! We are all on a journey in a world that is far from perfect and is full of imperfect people, longing for something more and something good!

So, here I go. One thing that has become more and more evident to me is the fact I often react to quickly and harshly in certain situations. It's not always a bad thing to react quickly, especially being a mom of two little ones. What can compare to a mother's instinct? Sensing that danger is about to happen, and when it does, moving quickly to rescue her child. In that sense, reacting quickly is definitely a good thing. I wish that's what I was talking about here. However, I'm finding that my quick reactions are usually responses of anger, hurt, or in my perceive "right" to defend myself. I end up feeling really guilty and regretting it after the fact. There has got to be a better way to handle these things.

I grew up in a very loving home with a dad who was (and still is) a great provider. He has taught and instilled in me the value and importance of working hard. I also grew up with a mom who was very nurturing and giving of herself. But even in the best of homes, there are issues. I know for the Fallis household, one of our biggest issues was (and still is) having a short fuse. Growing up, it didn't take too much to get one of us upset. When we did, the result was usually elevated voices and lots of yelling. Funny how when you live this way you don't notice it as much as others do. When I married Mario, who is much more mellow and patient with his responses, I began to realize how deep seeded this issue really was. This surfaced mostly by observing how differently we reacted to the same situations. In addition, Mario's kind words often rubbed me the wrong way. I can't lie, I wasn't always grateful for that, at times even angry. But I definitely don't feel that way now.

Growing up, I just though, "Well, this is how we are, it's just our personality." I'm reminded how often I used that excuse to justify my ugliness. It's just wrong! I was not created to have and ugly personality. None of us were. If God tells us to be self-controlled then that's the way He created us to be, although sin came into the picture. I'm learning that even in a world that is sinful and imperfect, God still desires for His children to be self-controlled. I'm grateful it isn't something I need to battle and conquer on my own. God is more than willing to help me overcome and even set me free from such a stronghold.

So how do you do that? First let me say, we all have our own struggles and this might not be yours, but I think we battle them just the same. We can work to overcome them or let them rule over us. I don't know about you but I want to change. I want to be a more patient, self-controlled and loving woman, wife, mom and friend. I don't want to be quick to react when things rub me the wrong way or upset me. I definitely don't want my kids thinking this is normal. So what to do? For me, I need to surrender daily to the Lord and give this over to Him by asking Him to help me. Only He can overcome a monster this big. Prayer is numero uno for me When I'm finding myself i situations where I can react to quickly, I'm learning to stop, take a deep breath and ask God to help me with it. Especially when situations arise that are hurtful and make me angry. I'm still not a pro at doing that. In fact, I find myself failing more than succeeding, but I'm also learning that grace is much bigger than I know and character development takes time. I'm so grateful for that! It has been a very humbling process when I do fail, to have to admit and ask for forgiveness. I'm getting pretty good at that though! I think my children are shocked at the number of times when I've gone to the to say I'm sorry and ask for their forgiveness. But wow, what an awesome thing for them to see and learn.

I don't want to waste anymore time and energy on reacting to things that, as time passes, won't even matter. This may be a battle I fight for the rest of my life but one I'm willing to fight. I know that where I am weak, He (God) is strong! My prayer is not only to conquer this but also to react quickly to the things that are most important in this life. Like being there for someone who needs a friend, being generous and encouraging, and praying for someone who needs it!

Politics: Shaping the Attitude of Believers

2011-05-03T19:35:00.000-07:00

Why do some Christians think they need to be so largely influenced by politics? I remember during my earlier years as and adult, I felt such an importance to stand a certain way politically and to let my voice be heard. After all, I was told that it is every Christian’s duty to do so. As I’ve gotten older, I don’t feel quite the same way anymore. Please don’t get me wrong; I do think it is a privilege to vote and to prayerfully consider whom you should vote for (not vote because of a certain party either). I’m grateful that we have these rights in our country. I just don’t believe as Christians, that our political convictions and ideas should shape our attitudes and ways of thinking. Yet I think some believe that is of utmost importance. Maybe that’s why I’ve been so troubled the past few weeks as I’ve read comments made by some of my brothers and sisters on Facebook. To be completely honest, I’ve been very disappointed.

I would like to address the treatment of our president. There is a group of Christians out there that are bashing the president, saying very harsh and hateful things. It’s not just on Facebook either; it’s in the media and even in some churches. It makes me sad especially when it comes from those I love. I think some feel justified because they view the president as ungodly and lets be honest, some even because he is a democrat. Listen, it cannot be justified. Whether you voted for him or not, whether you agree with him or not, whether you like him or not, it is wrong! God is very clear in 1 Peter 2:13 that we are to submit ourselves for God's sake to EVERY authority instituted by man. He doesn't say just the ones we love or the "godly" ones, He says EVERY! Paul even warns us in Romans 13, that he who rebels against this authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and brings judgment on one’s self.

So how do we submit to our leaders especially those, we may not care for or agree with? I think first we need to realize that God is behind it all. Romans 13:1 says, “For there is no authority except that which God has established. God has established the authorities that exist. “ I actually find that very comforting. It tells me that no matter who is “governing”, God is the one in control. Listen, if you don’t like President Obama or if you didn’t like President Bush, rest assured that God isn’t panicked by who the president is. He is in control and when all is said and done He will get the glory due Him.

Secondly as believers, we need to take a look at the life of Jesus. If we are truly His follower’s lets do as He did. Not once did Jesus ever bash, put down or attack the government or leaders of His day (and they were far from godly). In fact, he was quick to remind them that all authority that had been given was actually granted by God. The Kingdom of Heaven is not of this world, although it is definitely for it. Jesus’ political end game was the establishment of God’s Kingdom, not to endorse any man made system. His purpose for being here was an entirely a different matter even though many Jews were waiting for the Messiah to come in and over throw the government. He could’ve easily overthrown the government and He most definitely could’ve judged it’s leadership, but it wasn’t the timing for that. His purpose was much greater. Our purpose is much greater.

I would really like to encourage my brothers and sisters to stay focused on God’s activity and engage in it. We want to bring Glory to our God that has done so much for us. If there has ever been a time for God’s people to be a light here in America, it is now! Our country and our world desperately need the LORD. We will not do this by bashing the president or anyone else. We are called to be respectful citizens. May God’s grace and love radiate through us. I encourage you to read Romans 13 and 1 Peter 2; this is how God wants us to stand when it comes to government. Lets pray and submit so God will be glorified through us!

Beaten, but still standing

2011-04-28T08:41:00.000-07:00

Wow, it has definitely been awhile since I’ve written, or done much of anything. The past few months have been full of heartache, disappointment and hurt. A lot has happened in my life and the life of our family. It really does feel like we’ve been through a great battle and have felt many blows. Funny how life can seem dandy one day and then your whole world seems to fall apart the next. When it rains, it pours! This time around has been most difficult, because I have felt a big attack on my faith.

Eight months ago, Mario, the kids and I took a huge step of faith as a family. One much like Peter, when he stepped out of boat to walk on the water to the LORD with nothing solid under his feet, but trusting in a God who is capable of anything. This step was one that we had prayerfully made and fully trusted was the right one. Within a month of that initial step, what we had thought we were stepping into became very messy. Promises made by someone we trusted fell through. We were found scrambling for help and the panic I experienced felt as though I was drowning.

I wish I could say it was short lived. However, the truth of the matter was, it only became a bigger problem. As if we weren’t already struggling enough, more and more seemed to be crashing down on us. Have you ever been in a place where you feel like you just can’t take anymore? Like you are going to die if it doesn’t stop? That’s how I began to feel. There were even moments, to be honest days, where I wondered where Jesus was. Did He hear us? Did He care? Why is this happening? We thought we were being obedient, so why was this happening? I found myself agonizing before the LORD as I asked these questions. We prayed, we sought, we asked others to pray, we fasted, we read, we tried to stay focused and yet in all of it, we seemed to come up empty. Things seemed to continue to crash in on us, as well. At least that’s how I felt.

I found myself questioning the character of God, who had always proved faithful to me and our family. It really hurt! Never before, in the 26 years of being a Christian, had I felt this way. Had I been in tough situations before? Absolutely! I guess never to such magnitude. I wanted to give up. We wanted to give up. But God gave Mario and I two very precious gifts that wouldn’t allow us to do that. Their names are Londyn and Brayden. Seriously, in all of this, they have been my saving grace. Did I mention they are gifts from God? He did care! Mario and I tried really hard to keep our children from being affected by all of this, but kids are much smarter than we realize. Might I add, they can be very tuned in to the Spirit. As I would put the kids to bed at night, Londyn started praying that God would do a miracle for our family. She prayed her heart out for mommy and especially daddy. Brayden started doing the same. This went on for over a month. Suddenly there was a huge shift. Was the battle over? No! But there was a new perspective. I can’t speak for Mario, but my eyes were opened to the fact that God has been very active in all of this. He has been right here. He has used our gracious family and friends to see us through. He has provided for us in ways that we had never seen coming. He has given us opportunities that we wouldn’t of had otherwise. Daily He has carried us and been faithful!

With a new perspective, I see that things most definitely could have been worse. I’m praying it never will be. We are still experiencing some aftershock but we are moving forward. This continues to be a journey and much healing is still needed. I want to encourage you that if you are going through your own battles and feel completely trapped, don’t turn from the LORD, turn to Him. He does hear you! He does care! In His graciousness and perfect timing, He will give you exactly what you need. Know this, life happens, people will let us down (even unintentionally) and there is definitely an enemy who is out to destroy us, but God can use anything for His glory and our good. If you stand in Him, He will make you steadfast and although you may feel beaten, you will still be found standing!

Me at my ugliest!

2011-02-17T14:08:00.000-08:00

In my last blog, I talked about the account in Genesis where God warns Cain that sin is crouching at his door, desiring to have him, and how he must master it (or in the ESV version, rule over it). We then see Cain choose to not listen to God. Instead he lets his anger burn as he acted out. Funny how lessons learned as we study and read, play out in our own lives. I believe with all my heart that God wanted me to remember this as I've gone through the past two weeks. I have found myself very frustrated with pretty much everything, agitated to say the least. I have been short with my kids, mean to my husband, angry with others and just flat out have had a very bad attitude. The reality is that I've been completely ugly. And I feel it. It is an awful feeling. Sure during the yelling, rage or however it has manifested itself, I'm not really thinking about the ugliness of it. But as I've gone to bed at the end of the day it has brought much heart ache and tears. I hate it and I'm suppose to.

Last night, as I laid in bed asking God to forgive me, He quickly reminded me of Cain. How Cain had every opportunity to master the sin crouching at his door. And how God was right there to help him. God doesn't want me or any of us to try and do that on our own. The reality is most of the time it just seems impossible to do. As I was thinking and praying about it, I realized that we do have choices in the mater and for the believer we have the promised Holy Spirit. He is the power and the fire of God that brings conviction as well as the strength to overcome battles that seem much bigger than us. Can I just say how relieved I am to know this. And yes, I knew it before hand but I just needed to be reminded. I know the conviction can be tough to wrestle with but it is for our good. It keeps us from things that are very destructive. I was also reminded of the faithfulness and goodness of God. That He is quick to forgive and slow to be angry. In spite of my sin, He loves me even still. That no matter how ugly I've been and how deep I've gone, He is ever present and extends His mercy to me and covers me in His grace.

Sin not only hurts us but it usually hurts those we care most about. I mentioned it but I have been very short with my kids and my husband. I have not practiced much patience the past few weeks. Although I know they love me very much, I can also tell that they would just rather not be around me. That is a very hard reality. I know if I'm not careful, this can be very damaging. I want my family to know they can always come to me and I want them to enjoy me as their wife and mommy. I want my kids to grow up remembering the good times with Mommy and that she was patient and loving. Even when she was mad and had to discipline, she did so with love. So with that, I've learned that I need to ask them for forgiveness. Can I just say how good that is for children to see? Some would never think of admitting to their children they were wrong. But it is so good to be humble and transparent before them. It teaches them to do the same.

Finally, I just wanted to point out that sin is and will always be (this side of eternity) crouching at our door, desiring to have us. God wants us to master it. Will I fail at times? Yes! Will you? Yes! My battles and weaknesses most likely look very different than yours. Regardless, I think it is something we need to continue to take before the Lord and ask for His help. When we fail, we need to ask for His forgiveness as well as others. Is it easy? No it isn't! I've had to make a very conscious effort to work hard at it everyday. I've caught myself quite a few times, but I can tell that praying about it has made all the difference. As well as admitting to my children I do have issues but I'm committed to work on them. It makes for a better day that is for sure. I'm excited for bed tonight knowing that my day hasn't been ruined because of a bad attitude.

Crouching at our door

2011-01-17T15:20:00.000-08:00

This week I’ve been really thinking about life. Specifically, hurtful circumstances that many of my friends and family are going through. There seems to be so much pain and heartache out there, more than one can seem to bear at times. I’ve really been thinking about people hurting people, how I’ve hurt people myself and I’ve really been troubled with how much it goes on in the church body. It’s awful to say the least. If anyone should love it should be God’s people, right? After all, didn’t He say that He is Love? It’s very hard to watch someone you love be hurt by another. It makes me mad and at the same time, very sorrowful. Just this week, a very serious accusation was made about someone I love dearly that is a flat out lie. It was the type of lie that can destroy a person, a reputation, and a family as well. It just makes me sick. It’s very hard to see someone you love go through something like this. I can actually think of a few other situations much like this one.

I have found myself this week asking hard questions like, Why God? How could someone do these things? It’s one thing to hurt because of sickness or a loss but why do people hurt each other so bad? Why do I hurt people? Especially those I know well and love most? Why do we blow it off like it’s not a big deal or why do we try and justify our actions? God did answer that question for me. I was reminded of a verse from Genesis 4. It is the story of Cain and Abel, brothers that had both brought their offerings before the Lord. God finds Abel’s offering very pleasing but not Cain’s. Instead of Cain making this right, he becomes angry with both his brother and God. In God’s goodness, he comes to Cain and asks him why he is so angry and goes on to let him know that not all is lost. He can make it right, that’s how God works. He is patient with us and He wants us to see that we can make things right and that there is hope. But how often do we listen to Him? I don’t know about you, but I’m one who reacts on a whim, especially if I’m angry. God goes on to give Cain a warning. It was very insightful one at that. It comes from the story itself, and I was reminded that this was the answer to some of the questions I’ve been asking. God said this to Cain: “But if you do not do what is right, sin (wrong, iniquity) is crouching at your door, it desires to have you, but you must master it.” Genesis 4:7

Wow! Sin is crouching at our door like a wild beast ready to pounce on us and take us out. Now isn’t that a picture? Have you ever seen a lion crouched down waiting to take down its prey? It is a really intense thing. Sin desires to have us. Not to trip us up a little, but to have us, to posses us and to take over our lives. I don’t know about you but that seems like an awfully powerful statement and warning. I believe that God really wanted Cain to get the seriousness of this. If you read the rest of the verse, you will also see though that it was for Cain to choose. We get to choose weather sin will over take us. Will we let it? Or will we stand firm and not give into it? God says we must master it.

Cain doesn’t listen to God. He lets his anger burn to the point that he takes his brothers life. Really? Over something like this? Over something that God told him could be fixed? Yes! Many times I have refused to listen and my choice has been to let my anger burn. After all, I have a right to be angry and to feel this way. Been there? It’s hard. Have I taken somebody’s life because of it? Not in the literal sense but I have done much damage and caused a whole lot of pain to others. I can be so selfish!

This is why I’m seeing so many people being hurt: Because we refuse to listen to the grace of God and to see sin for what it really is. It leads to gossip (even on FB), lies about someone, grudges, un-forgiveness, emotional abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse and the list goes on. Then, we often try and justify our actions or blow them off like it’s nothing. I really want this to change in me. I really want to learn to listen and remember the reality of sin. This is my prayer for myself and for God’s people. I know others hurt us but I want to give that hurt to God. I don’t want to carry it and I don’t want it to turn into my own sin. I hate the ugliness of sin and how it makes me feel. Listen, holding forgiveness from others only makes us feel worse. Sin only makes us feel worse. Let’s listen to God’s grace today and let’s master sin.

Becoming like a child....

2010-12-01T07:03:00.000-08:00

I’ve been thinking about children quite a bit lately, especially my own. As adults, we are the ones teaching our children. Although that is typically the case, I find my own kids teaching me more and more about life, God, and how we should live.

As a family, we’ve gone through so much the past few months with Mario’s job and ministry. It hasn’t been easy. Some days Mario and I just want to quit. At times, things have seemed very hopeless and completely overwhelming. Last week was a very tough week. It all started on Sunday morning when a storm hit SLC and our power was out for over 24 hours. The rest followed: both cars broke down, our kids were sick, both Mario’s parents were in the hospital, Mario’s new job at Olive Garden didn’t work out (he wasn’t making much money at all for working long hours). It has just been really rough. But it was through all of what seemed to be bad that my kids reminded me of all that was good.

We were quite annoyed the power was out so long but our kids were absolutely thrilled to have a sleep over at Grandma and Grandpa’s. When both cars broke down in less than 24 hours, I was thinking,
“Are you kidding me? How in the world can we afford to pay for it?” When the tow truck came to get our car, our kiddos were so excited to see it towed away by such a big noisy tow truck. It reminded them of Mater, the tow truck from the movie Cars. When they were sick, I felt exhausted after being up with them all night. It is always hard to see your kids sick and uncomfortable. But they loved having a movie day at home and time to cuddle with Mom. It was very difficult to see both of our parents sick and in the hospital, but when we went up to the hospital to see grandpa Efren, they were not only happy to see him, but they were thrilled to go up the “alligator” (aka elevator) and to lay on the hospital bed, making it go up and down.

It has been really hard to see Mario work as much as he has, only to have come home with bad tips. I’ve missed him. Although the kids missed their Daddy, they always squealed with excitement every time he walked through the door when he got home. They always had the biggest smiles on their faces, especially when he would bring them a yummy treat. It was really priceless one night, as they emptied their piggy banks and brought Daddy all of their change to help out. We’ve tried not to let our kids know our stresses, but they see it and feel it. It makes me proud to see my kids have such generous and compassionate hearts.

I know as adults we work to make sure things are taken care of (bills, work and the well being of the family). As I’ve watched the way my kids handle things compared to how we adults do, I have come to realize the lessons they have taught me. I tend to dwell on the bad instead of finding the good things. They aren’t beaten down by life stresses and the definitely are far from feeling hopeless. Although they definitely feel some of the backlash, they are quick to move on and find joy in the everyday blessings. I want that for myself. God wants that for each one of us.

This past week we celebrated Thanksgiving. Can I just say, I really do have so much to be thankful for. I’ve been given so much. I’m blessed beyond measure. I’m thankful for the two most precious little gifts I have been given: Londy and Brayden. Not just so I can be their mom. although I find it an absolute joy and privilege, but to experience life, love and joy. God has given them to me, but He’s also used them to reveal Himself to me in more ways than I count. We can know the goodness of God in all circumstances when we have him in our lives. However, I’m reminded that it often means I need to become like a child.

All other ground is sinking sand

2010-11-03T07:56:00.000-07:00

Here we go again! Time to vote and exercise that privilege. I’m grateful to live in a country where we have a say (very small one but none the less) in what goes on and that we can vote for the people that we want to govern us. I have to be honest though, I always get grieved as I’m talking with some other Christians or I see some (not all) their postings on FB about this very thing. Not because they have voted because, I do feel that is important, but rather, if the majority of the vote is democratic we are doomed and it is the end of the world or if it is republican. some how we are saved, rescued and have our country is back on track. That grieves me! Seriously, I have such a hard time with that. For one, where does our hope really lie and whom does it rest in? I’m sorry but if all of our government was republican, I’m almost sure, in fact I am sure, that we would not be saved and there would still be major issues. The fact is, there are many dishonest people that govern under the label of republican. They won’t keep their promises and they don’t always have our best intentions. Why? Not because they are republican or democrat but mere men and women like you and I. I love what the psalmist says in Psalm 20:7

“Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.”

Granted, I know that in our current day and age, we don’t use chariots and horses like they did back then, but I think we could definitely fill that in with things of our day. Some trust in their jobs, their bank accounts, themselves and their own efforts, in other people, in our government and the list is endless. But we need to trust in the name of the Lord our God and that’s it! He alone is where our hope should lie. I want to get this with all that I am. I’m guilty of putting my trust in stuff and people besides God. The Psalmist goes on to say that those things collapse and fall but those who trust in God will rise and stand upright. In the end, there is only One who will stand and His name is Faithful and True.

I just want to say one more thing that I really think about when its election time. God is in no way political in the American sense of the word. He is not a politician. Yes, He does govern and rule, but He is always fair, always just and He doesn’t fit into our political system. He is beyond our human ways of running things. When the Jews wanted to be ruled by a King it wasn’t God’s way but He gave them what they wanted. He wanted to be the One to take care of them. Because when God governs, He does it in love with always our best in mind. When Jesus was here on earth, the Jews wanted Him to over through the Romans, rule and set them free from the oppression. Listen, that isn’t such a bad request, but Jesus was so clear that this was not why He came. He was about His Father’s business and an entirely different Kingdom. He came to set the captives free. not from a Roman oppression, but from something much BIGGER, sin and death. In return He gives us real life.

A day is coming when Jesus will come back and at that moment every knee will bow and every tongue confess that He is rightful LORD. He will rule and govern in everyway. I can’t wait for that. All things will submit and be under Him.

So please vote but as you do, prayerfully consider whom it is you are voting for knowing that they are just mere men and women. Pray for them as they govern and that they will make Godly decisions. Be careful never to put your hope in them (or anything else), they will fail. Remember that God isn’t a politician. He is God and He is about something entirely different. If you are one of His, lets not be quick to be political (republican or democrat) but be about His business.

I love this song. I believe it goes along well will what I’ve been sharing. It really spoke to me about my hope and my trust being in the Solid Rock and how all other ground is sinking sand. Be sure to listen! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQgD_Wg9DG4

Stop Praying! Take a long look at Him before speaking another word.

2010-10-23T10:46:00.000-07:00

I was really humbled this week as I started reading the book, “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan. Great book so far! In the first chapter, “stop praying,” he suggests that we should stop talking at God for a while and really take a long look at Him before speaking another word. Solomon warned us not to rush into God’s presence with words.

Ecclesiastes 5:2: “Don’t be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.”

Chan challenges believers to stand in awe of God and to have a fear of Him. In our culture, we are often slow to listen, quick to speak and quick to become angry. The fear of God isn’t there like is should be. This really was so good for me to hear, mostly because I find myself doing those very things. I love God, but there are too many times I go before Him in prayer without stopping to think about how incredibly awesome He truly is. I’m so quick to ask Him for things. Please don’t get me wrong, I know that God, as a Father, loves for us to come to Him with needs and requests, and sometimes, our requests are urgent. But as I examine my everyday life with God, I see such a need for me to stop, gaze upon and be completely undone, awestruck and captivated by Him!

Chan has this link to his website called the “Awe Factor” http://crazylovebook.com/videos_awe.html Please check it out!

It is an amazing view from space. It shows pictures of the earth, sun and stars. As the video progresses, the images move from current time to light years away until you can no longer point out our sun in the more than 350,000,000,000 galaxies. The earth becomes less than a speck of dust. It’s absolutely incredible! God’s creation is “Ginormous” and so is He. I am completely humbled at the fact that space is so big and that our scientists are continually commenting on how much bigger it is than previously thought. Yet the universe’s Creator cares about this little planet. The one that seems so big to us, but looks like nothing in comparison to His cosmos. What’s even more awesome, He cares about and loves us. That leaves me speechless. The Psalmist writes:

“O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens.

From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger.

When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?

You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.

You made him ruler over the works of your hands; you put everything under his feet: all flocks and herds, and the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, and the fish of the sea, all that swim the paths of the seas.

O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!” Psalm 8

When He shows up!

2010-10-05T06:48:00.000-07:00

I was excited to see September come and go quickly. It wasn’t the best of months for me. Most of it was full of doubt, worry and fear; heaped with a double portion of emotion. I am grateful for a God who did not leave me, but was right there the entire time. I’m so glad that He was, too! A few blogs back, I talked about God being my rock during this season I’m going through. Well, turns out I’ve learned that Him being my Rock means that He is much bigger than even I originally thought. He has proved Himself faithful to my family, and me providing for us in such a miraculous way. One provision after another, like nothing I have ever seen. I’ve been completely amazed by Him. I experienced miraculous emotional healing as well as great provision. I am just awed and blown away.

It is hard, when going through the storm, to see any good that is coming from it. It can even be more difficult to see God during these times. A good friend reminded me that when Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were thrown into the fire, they didn’t see God at first. Neither did those looking in, for that matter. But God showed up in that fire. He made His presence known. That is exactly what God has done for me during this trying time. I think deep down I knew He would prove Himself faithful, but all too often, it’s easy for me to forget this. Even though it always seems like He shows up at the “last minute,” I’m learning that it’s always right on time.

Through it all, I’m realizing a huge life lesson: Trials and hardships really do produce perseverance as well as faith. Knowing all the things that were out of our hands and control this past month, we had to trust God like we never have before. It really has been good for me. I am a planner and I like things done a certain way. I like to know what is going to happen and I’m not to good with surprises or unsurety. I also tend to try and fix things if it looks like it isn’t going to go accordingly. This time, I wasn’t able to do any of that. So, it was hard for me, yet necessary. Again, I am glad September is over, but it is nice to look back and see the wonderful work God is doing. My trials haven’t taken Him by surprise; in fact, they only made ways for Him to show up. My tight fisted hands that hold things so tightly have been gently pried open so that He could take my burdens and all those things that often comes with it (doubt, worry and fear). I’m not meant to live that way. There is something very liberating when you do let go and surrender. I’m only hoping that I continue to do so.

Here is to a new month, a deeper trust and a God who always shows up!

Wounded

2010-09-25T09:54:00.000-07:00

Wow! I never realized how many deep wounds I have and the need I have for healing. Wounds of all different kinds: big ones, little ones, old ones, new ones and very deep ones. I know that wounds surface for a reason. God doesn’t want us to stay wounded. He wants to heal, restore us and cause something very beautiful to come from them.

It is so easy to bury our wounds because we don’t want to deal with them. They can be so hurtful, some even unbearable, that we often act like they don’t exist. We avoid dealing with them at all cost. But God does want to deal with them! He will not go there, however, unless we allow Him to. For those of us who are moms, we know how traumatic it can be when one of our babies gets a horrible owie. Not only is the owie traumatic, having that wound cleaned out can be just as painful for our child. Even though there are many tears and pleas to stop, we finish cleaning the wound because it is necessary. Healing isn’t always instantaneous either. It may take several days to heal, which often means more cleansing and band-aids. There are also wounds on a grander scale, like when someone has been in a terrible accident of some kind. Some of those wounds take years to heal. It is very long and painful process to get there, but there is nothing like being whole again.

I really believe that God has been exposing areas in my life that are in need of healing. I don’t mind addressing the small ones, but the deep ones are extremely hard for me to deal with. In fact, some of them have been so deep that I didn’t even realize that they were there. Some, I never even viewed as wounds. God has been showing me that they are there, that they really affect my attitude, how I respond to certain situations, how I view others, myself and Him. As these wounds are brought to the surface, I’ve also come to realize how many times I have wounded others. This reality is just as painful to deal with. The wounds I’ve endured and the ones I’ve caused are not easy to deal with. However, I am so grateful that God is the healer and that He can be trusted. He knows me better than I know myself and knows exactly what I need. He not only is an incredible Daddy, He is also the best doctor there is.

I grew up in a tradition that was big on physical healing. I have personally seen God do some amazing things in very sick people. Complete miracles and answers to prayer! God is good, but His healing doesn’t stop there or even start there. For several months now, Isaiah 61:1-3 has been a passage that I’ve really been meditating on. (Even before I started this blog, which is where the phrase “beauty for ashes” comes from, and completing the study “Captivating,” which is key scripture used in that book). In Luke’s Gospel, Jesus quotes this passage, declaring why it is that He came. Isaiah writes:

“The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion-- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor.”

This is healing! This is why He came! This isn’t for later but for right now. God sees wounds that aren’t just physical that everybody else can see. He sees wounds that go far deeper, where no one else can see. He wants to heal the hurts and give gladness instead of mourning. His desire is to replace those ashes with a crown of beauty. That is my prayer not only for myself but for others as well. I hope you will let Him. He can be trusted and will bring something very beautiful from it!

Amazing Grace How Sweet the Sound!

2010-09-16T08:18:00.000-07:00

Today I’ve been really thinking about how often I seem to mess up in life. I have been a Christian for most of my life and my desire is to really bring honor to the LORD because I love Him and He has done so much for me. I find that although this is the case, I recognize more and more how much I mess up and how truly awful I can be. Lately, I’ve seen this happen quite a bit. It is in those moments though that God reminds me of His amazing grace.

Grace is the free, unmerited favor and love of God! It isn’t something we earn or can even come close to earning. It is a gift! I’m glad that in all the mess-ups I do, one thing I have learned it that God’s grace is sufficient for me. I also love how God can use a mess to make something really good.

I’m sure most of you have heard the song “Amazing Grace”. It is a beautiful song written by a man who was far from God. His name was John Newton. One night while sailing at sea, a terrible storm battled his ship and he was terrified. It was then that John cried out to God asking Him to save him. It was that night that he met God and God gave him His amazing grace (and the words to one of the most popular hymns of all time).

As I was reading through the lyrics of the song and singing them, I realized how precious the chorus of that song is to my heart. But it doesn’t stop there, the second and third verses to that song are about a life journey with God and how He continues to pour out the grace we need through out our lifetime. I am just as grateful for this. I need God’s grace daily. I couldn’t live with out it!

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9

Here is a link if you would like to look at the complete song of "Amazing Grace". http://www.amazing-grace-lyrics.com/

My Rock

2010-09-08T17:18:00.001-07:00

I don’t know why change is such a hard thing for me. I get excited for it but then I realize how difficult it really is going to be. It seems like most things in our family’s life right now is changing. New job, new church, new friends, Londy starting kindergarten, Brayden starts preschool this week and even the season is starting to change. All very good things but it still is hard. I miss what was especially when it comes to my kids. It all changes so fast. It can be very unsettling for a season.

This week, I have shed quite a few tears. I’m still excited for what is happening but have felt very anxious at the same time. I feel like I have been in a huge, horrible storm with not much to hold onto. People I thought would be here haven’t been. I am so grateful for those who have. The financial security hasn’t been the greatest. Even our own efforts haven’t seemed enough. So what have I done? I’ve become anxious, hurt, angry and down. Completely beside myself, like our world has been turned upside down. But I knew that it wasn’t good for me to wallow like this. It’s not healthy for me and it isn’t good for my family. I did the only thing I knew to do in a situation like this, cry out to God and ask very dear friends to pray.

I got a phone call soon after, it was someone very dear to my heart. She not only prayed with me but she also shared a whole lot of wisdom with me. I was so grateful! I even felt some relief. But, it is easy when you are going through something hard to fall quickly back into panic, reaching for security. I pretty much cried all day long. Woke up the next day and felt a bit better after a good night of sleep. I was in my car driving to my cleaning job, listening to music and I felt God speak to my heart. He said something like this, “Tera, everything in life changes and moves. The only thing that is always the same and never moves is ME!” Wow, was that ever what I needed to hear. He is absolutely right. Every situation can change; people change, and things that once were in our hand’s grasp can be gone. It is all shifting sand but God is a rock that will never move. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. HE will always be there! The picture that comes to my mind is a lighthouse. Waves can be pounding and crashing all around with winds that of mighty force but that lighthouse will not be moved. In the storm it stands and after the storm, it stands. That is God! No storm fazes Him. Absolutely incredible!

I’m grateful that God heard me when I cried out to Him. I can put my full trust in Him. I love Him and I definitely know He loves me. I will go through storms and so will you. It is part of life. Being a believer in Jesus doesn’t mean I am exempt from trials. There is so much good that comes out of seasons like this. It builds trust, perseverance, character and a faith that can move mountains. It is easy? Absolutely not! But when it’s over I can look back and say, “Wow! God has been my rock”.

LONDYN

2010-09-02T06:45:00.000-07:00

One of the most incredible gifts God has ever given to me is my precious Londyn. I find it an absolute privilege that God has entrusted us to care for and raise such a jewel. She is so precious! Sure, I’m her mom, but she really is. I remember seeing her for the first time, her chubby little cheeks and beautiful dark skin and instantly loving her. The more I see her grow, the more and more I love her.

She has lost those chubby little cheeks but she is turning into such a beautiful girl, and she still has her beautiful dark skin. Her smile melts my heart. She is growing way too fast for me, but at the same time, it is a joy to see her grow. I’ve really been noticing lately what a heart of gold she has. She hates to see people hurt and animals suffer. It brings her to tears at times. I pray she never loses this. She is very tender and kindhearted.

I want her to know that the beauty God has given her comes from the inside out. That the inside is always what matters most. At the same time, I love the fact that she is thrilled to dress up, paint nails, do her hair and even on days we are home, put on make up. All things that most girls enjoy. I love to watch her run to her Daddy and twirl, asking him if he thinks she is beautiful. Mario always has the right answer.

Londyn loves learning. She is curious and full of questions much like her Daddy. There have been many times I have been amazed by what she thinks about, especially for a five year old. She is a sponge. I pray that God would guard her mind from the dangers that are out there. I also pray that she will always have a desire to learn, that she will continue to ask questions and know what truth is for herself.

I want her to know how much she is loved, that Daddy and Mommy love her so very much. I want her to know that God’s love for her is the greatest. That He created her in His image and has great plans for her. Whatever God has for her, she can do it and be herself.

I love you Londy!

Wrestling and digging deep to know for yourself!

2010-08-25T05:13:00.000-07:00

Wow! I have really enjoyed writing about U2 music. I seriously find it absolutely wonderful that God has used one of their songs to really speak to me about life, about my own life. In the first two verses I’ve found myself. I have been there and still am in many ways.

The past few months have been very good and very hard for me. I have wrestled with my own believes, thanks to my wonderful husband. Lol (especially for those of you who know him)! It all started with Mario, he began to ask me why as Christians we believe certain things. He would say things like, “Is this really what God meant when he said this?” and “Don’t you think this is what God really is saying?” Oh and my favorite, “Look at it from this point, I think this might be a better way of looking at it.” At first I was totally frustrated and even mad. I remember having these conversations a time or two and storming out of the room because I was so upset. I felt like the core of what I had believed for so long was being shaken, and it was.

I quickly came to realize that Mario wasn’t doing this. Instead, God was using him to challenge me about ideas that needed to change! For so long, my beliefs have been based solely on what the pastor or other Christians I have looked up to have said. At times, certain beliefs were simply because the denomination (the type of church) I attended said so in its doctrine. I’m discovering that although God uses people to speak into my life, they are people like the rest of us. There is always that human factor (and that’s definitely true of Mario too). Men and Women who are called and anointed by God to speak and teach His Word are so important, but like the rest of us, they are working to figure this out too. Knowing this, I have been encouraged to really search out my core beliefs. To not take everything I am taught in a certain kind of setting and just believe it because that is where it came from. We can and should test teaching with God’s Word.

It is important to study and dig deep into the Word of God for ourselves. I’m finding that as I do that, there is such a great richness to discover. It is so much more alive than I had ever thought and so much more. Even looking at the creation account in Genesis, I’m finding how detailed God is. That is just with His creation! Understanding how He has purpose behind everything, it’s amazing! I’m also finding that there are definitely things I have believed that aren’t even in the Bible or completely taken out of the context in which it was intended. It is so important to understand the entire story.

And then there are questions! I’ve thought at times that questions were a bad thing. A lack of faith. I don’t anymore. I think that God loves for us to come to Him and ask questions, even when they are hard ones. Jesus was a Rabbi (teacher). I’m almost positive that He was asked many things. That’s what a good teacher does, teaches and answer questions. In many ways, Mario and I are teachers to our children and boy do they have questions. We are thrilled when they ask us questions, even the very hard ones. It shows their desire to learn and grow and just the fact that they come to us is a wonderful thing. God not only is a teacher, but He is also a very loving Father. He treasures our curious hearts.

So if you find yourself in either of these places, be encouraged. It is a good thing to wrestle and want to know, to study and dig deep. Don’t believe things just because that is what you are told. Know it for yourself. Know what you believe and why you believe it. And remember, there is always more to learn and more to know but you can have a great teacher who welcomes your questions.

Second Verse

2010-08-17T18:13:00.000-07:00

In my last blog, we started looking at U2’s “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for”. As I had been listening to that song so much was revealed to me about life and the longing in our hearts. Today, I want to really look at the second verse of that song. Again, I find myself in that verse. See if you do too.The second verse goes like this;

I have kissed honey lips

Felt the healing in her fingertips

It burned like a fire

This burning desire

I have spoke with the tongue of angels

I have held the hand of a devil

It was warm in the night

I was cold as a stone

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

The first part of the verse definitely has to do with love. How many of us have felt if only we had a man or a woman to love and to love us our lives would be complete? We long for that burning desire. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with love, it is a beautiful thing. I have been married for eight years now and I love Mario so much. I am passionate for Him and He is for me.We love to be together. He is a gift and I am completely blessed to have him as my husband and best friend. But no matter how much Mario loves me and I love him, there is still a place in my heart he can’t fill. There have been seasons in my life that I felt alone and hurting even when he’s right there and he can’t fix it. He loves me and I love him but our love for each other isn’t perfect. I need more.

I see so many women who move from relationship to relationship searching for a love that will be completely fulfilling. In the process of that, many give parts of themselves away. Few find the man of their dreams, but even when some do, there is still something missing, something deep in the heart that can’t be fulfilled.

The second part of the verse talks about two exact opposites of the spectrum.One is the experience of something supernatural, heavenly. I grew up in church and have experienced some pretty powerful things. Miracles. Things that I knew without a shadow of a doubt were God’s hand at work. But I have to sadly admit, it is easy to get caught up and chase after those things. I have done it and I’ve seen many do it. I started desiring the miracles or the things of God instead of God himself. I would experience a miracle or a piece of heaven, and it would thrill me for quite sometime. But in the end, it did not satisfy. I’ve come to learn that those things were never meant too. Even still, when the novelty wears off, I’d most times pray for some other “experience,” when in reality, I needed God himself.

This often happened to Jesus. Many people followed after him to experience something amazing or to get something for themselves, when really Jesus was all about leading people to the Father.

The other experience can often be seen as a very desperate, dark and at times, selfish one. It is a decision that says I don’t care, I will do whatever it takes to fill this heart of mine, to numb the pain of life, anything to help me forget and rescue me from my circumstances. There are so many ways this looks. I have no doubt we’ve all done this at some point in our lives. Some things are definitely more harmful than others. In the beginning, it seems harmless, but in reality, it ends up hurting not just us, but those we love. In then end, it leaves us “cold as a stone.”

There truly is a place in each of our hearts that belongs only to God. We can try many things but not one of them can fill that place. Not one of them can satisfy that longing. Some may never understand this, while continuing on lives journey they will search and search but find they still haven’t found what they are looking for. I am so grateful for a loving God who is right there waiting.

I still haven't found what I'm looking for

2010-08-13T07:42:00.000-07:00

This week as I was driving by myself, I was listening to songs on my Ipod and a song came on that really made me think, it actually did more than that. As I listened I could tell that God was really speaking to my heart. The song is the U2’s “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.” As I listened to it maybe 3 or so times, I knew that it would be my next blog. It was the live set and so before Bono begins singing he says, “this is a gospel song, a kind of restless spirit.” And it truly is. The chorus itself is a continuous, “But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for”. I remember so many times listening to that song and thinking, so what is it that He’s looking for? What is he talking about? Actually, I thought wow, I sure feel sorry for him. But then I realized we’ve all asked this question at one time or another in our lives. Maybe even several times.

The words of the first verse go like this;

I have climbed highest mountains

I have run through the fields

Only to be with you

I have run

I have crawled

I have scaled these city walls

These city walls

Only to be with you

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

These lyrics describe a spiritual yearning. A God-yearning. I have been a Christian for most of my life, about 25 years. In those 25 years there has been moments in my life and even seasons where my heart has cried out, but I still haven’t found what I’m looking for. And I know this because much of my life as a Christian, (not always, but most of the time), I have looked at God as one who loves the world and loves me. Yet how can if be that He often feels so far away? Almost like He seems untouchable. Much of this is because of what I’ve been taught. That if I really want to know Him somehow, I need to fix myself first. Pray more, read more, sin less, pretty much be perfect. Then I could touch God and He would want me. I could just never get there. I was taught that it is about God’s grace, but then next sentence would be based on how I should get there. I couldn’t reach God and I was miserable trying!

So this verse to me was eye opening. I’ve been there. I’ve tried climbing the highest mountains, scaled walls and especially crawled just to be with God. But in all of that I wasn’t fulfilled. I didn’t seem any closer. So what would I do? Try harder, do more and heap a bunch of condemnation onto myself. It was a deep dark place to be.

Finally one day I gave up and I surrendered. I told God, I couldn’t do this anymore. I’ve tried everything! It’s like God told me, “Yes, everything but that!” You see, God in His goodness showed me that I was never created to try and strive to reach Him. All that would be required of me was to open up my heart to Him and surrender. He would meet me in that place. When He did, WOW, He really did! It was like He breathed life into me. I could now breathe and through that God has brought me much healing.

I can enjoy life and I can enjoy Him! I’m finding that prayer, reading and studying is really a time for me to grow and freely experience the God who loves me so much. It doesn’t need to look a certain way or be certain amount of time. It isn’t a duty and a striving. God wants us to enjoy Him and He wants to enjoy us. This is why we were created. To walk with Him just like Adam and Eve did in the garden. It’s a beautiful thing!

Beauty of a Woman

2010-07-31T09:31:00.000-07:00

As I continue this journey that God has been taking me on through the study “Captivating”, God has been teaching me so much about the beauty of a woman.

Beauty is such a hard thing for me. I know as a woman it is something I and if we are all honest, we struggle with and strive to have more and more of. We want to look beautiful! In our world it is all around us and constantly in our faces. How to look beautiful, be skinny, perfect hair, perfect teeth, perfect face, you name it. It seems like this list never ends. This is a huge struggle for many women. Please don’t get me wrong, I think it is okay to want to look beautiful but I don’t think it was ever meant to consume the heart of women. On the opposite end, some women try to hide their beauty for one reason or another. Plan Jane’s that don’t want to be noticed and stick out and so they hide their beauty. Both of these can be very unhealthy. And the reason I say this is because beauty isn’t something we need to try to get and strive for all the time and it isn’t something we should hide either! “God gave Eve a beautiful form and a beautiful spirit. She expresses beauty in both. Better, she expresses beauty simply in who she is. Like God, it is her essence.” Captivating-by John and Stasi Eldredge. Girls, we were made this way! Beauty matters and it is powerful! Beauty isn’t just something to captivate the eye but it speaks volumes about God and His creation.

I think to really understand beauty we need to look all the way back to the beginning, all the way back to the fall. We already know that men and women were made in the image of Almighty God. And that woman was not just and after thought but the Crown of Creation with a purpose. God made Adam and Eve to be one. So now fast forward a little to the fall. Who was it that the slithering, sneaky snake came to in the garden? Who is it he lied to? It was Eve. I’ve heard by many that the reason he came after Eve is because she was the weaker of the two. I disagree! In fact if you look at that portion of scripture you will find that Adam was most likely sitting right there as it all took place and didn’t do anything but eat the fruit himself (all this shows is that we are equally responsible). But that is another discussion. He definitely came after Eve for a reason.

First we need to look at the lying snake himself. Who is he really? You’re absolutely right if you said the devil or Satan. But who and how was he created? This is how he is described by God in Ezekiel 28:12-17,

…”You were the model of perfection, full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. You were in Eden, the garden of God; every precious stone adorned you: ruby, topaz and emerald, chrysolite, onyx and jasper, sapphire, turquoise and beryl. Your settings and mountings were made of gold; on the day you were created they were prepared. You were anointed as a guardian cherub, for so I ordained you. You were on the holy mount of God; you walked among the fiery stones. You were blameless in your ways from the day you were created till wickedness was found in you. Through your widespread trade you were filled with violence, and you sinned. So I drove you in disgrace from the mount of God, and I expelled you, O guardian cherub, from among the fiery stones. Your heart became proud on account of your beauty, and you corrupted your wisdom because of your splendor. So I threw you to the earth; I made a spectacle of you before kings.

He was made absolutely gorgeous. He was adorned with every precious stone. Beauty was who he was. And then wickedness found him and he wanted God’s glory. God in exercising his judgment threw him out and stripped all his beauty from him. Making him an ugly snake. God made a spectacle of him. Do you think he was a bit upset? Absolutely! He would despise God and hate him with all that he was. And because of this, he would try to get back at God. He can’t assault God’s character so he would insult His creation. His first target, Eve. It is no surprise that Satan would tempt Eve first. After all, she possessed the very thing that he had forfeited; Beauty.

For all who read this blog, I hope you are able to see that he still goes after women for this very reason. He has lied to so many women to think and feel they aren’t beautiful. He has tried to distort true beauty into something that is cheap and fake. This is such a battle. Almost crippling for some. That is why we see so many striving to obtain beauty, this is why we see so many trying to hide their beauty as though it is something to be despised. While this is an on going battle there is an end in sight, there is hope. A hope of redemption!

The Crown of His Creation-Part 2

2010-07-24T07:13:00.001-07:00

It was not good for man to be alone. God said that! Men and women were made to be relational just like our God. We were meant to share in this adventure. I have always understood that woman was made to be man’s helper. But through the study Captivating that I’m doing I’m learning that when God creates Eve, He calls her the Hebrew word, ezer kenegdo. “It is not good for man to be alone, I shall make him [an ezer kenegdo]. The English translation of this word is “helper” or “help mate”. I don’t feel that translation has really captured what God made when He made woman.

“The word ezer is used only twenty other places in the entire Old Testament. And every other instance the one being described is God himself, when you need him to come through for you desperately.” From Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge.

“Blessed are you, O Israel! Who is like you, a people saved by the LORD? He is your shield and helper (ezar) and your glorious sword.” Deut. 33:26, 29

“We wait in hope for the LORD, He is our help (ezar) and our shield.” Psalm 33:20

“I lift up my eyes to the hills-where does my help come from? My help (ezar) comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2

This kind of helper (ezar) is a “lifesaver”. The meaning behind that word is much more powerful and deep than just the world “help mate” as we see how the Lord is described in these verses. And the word kenegdo means alongside, or opposite to, a counterpart. Wow! That really tells me so much about how important women are and that God has given us an irreplaceable role. We are to be a helper that comes alongside to strengthen, protect and encourage. And I think that goes both ways.

I know that in the eight years we’ve been married, Mario and I have both helped strengthen each other in areas where we are weak. Some of that has been through encouragement and much prayer. It hasn’t always been easy but it is part of being made in the image of a wonderful God. He is our strength and encourager.

A good friend of mine and I were talking about this the other day and she shared with me something the Lord had been showing her as she was going through this study. That Eve was taken from Adam’s rib and the function of the ribs are to protect the vital organs and especially the heart. I thought this was really good stuff. The more I read the Word of God the more I see the symbolism in all He does. This totally makes sense to me. I know that when someone comes to hurt or harm Mario in anyway I am very protective. Say anything you want about me but you better not mess with my husband or my kids. I become fierce! His heart is so important to me and it is super important to God. I definitely want to help guard and protect it.

I want to encourage ladies, that you are not just the Crown of God’s creation but He has made you with great purpose and this is only part of that. There was a good reason that God saw it wasn’t good for man to be alone. God made us to be like Him, relational. We need each other. Of course I just mentioned the women’s side of all of it. Men also have an irreplaceable role to play. Both needed and both very important. If you aren’t married this still applies to you. We have dads, brothers and friends all around us that need us too. We should encourage, strengthen and protect them as well.

The Crown of His Creation- Part 1

2010-07-20T14:09:00.000-07:00

So as I read the creation account and look at the world for myself, I am absolutely amazed by the beauty, artwork and all the tiny details in which God formed things. Wow! He is Amazing! The work of His hands is breath taking. This morning I was outside walking my dog Hershey and I was looking at the purple roses in my front yard. They are beautiful! Each bud different, delicate and detailed and they make up this absolutely beautiful bush. God made all of it. I wish I had been here when He did. To see how He made something grand out of something that was formless and empty. To see Him breath life all over things and in to things. Wow!

So with that, God has been showing me not only were we made as men and women in His image but the importance of both. That just like the rest of creation, God specifically made us special and with a role to play. And that it is a grand design that is very detailed and thought out. God had made this amazing world with light, water, plants, flowers, trees, and animals of all kinds. And what did He say? That it was good! And then God sets His own image on the earth. A being just like Him. A Son.

“The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.” Genesis 2:7

Adam (or man) was the triumph of His work. Created in God's image. A true Masterpiece! And it would seem that creation would’ve been complete at that moment. But God saw that something wasn’t right. Something was missing from this wonderful amazing world He had just created. And that something was Eve. Woman!

“The Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man He made into a woman and brought her to the man.” Genesis 2:21-22

Let me just stop and share something. The world and the church especially, have often painted this picture of women as being an after thought. Really? Would God after making this breathe taking world and a magnificent masterpiece (man), make an after thought? I’m sorry but the God I know and love would never think, “Oops, and I almost forgot.” He started BIG and would end BIG. She was the crescendo, the grand finally! She was the Crown of His creation! Also bearing His image and His beauty. God would reveal something about Himself through her. Grace, tenderness, gentleness, a nurturing heart, devotion, and so much more.

Our world is so tainted in its view on women and it has been for quite sometime, almost forever. And it breaks my heart that some in the family of God think women are lesser than and have nothing of offer or shouldn't offer it even it they do just because they are women. Since the fall, women are seen as week, powerless and are cheapened. And because of that many women either feel they need to fight to be respected or hide and never become who they were created to be. Either way this isn't how it was intended for us. God wants to clothe each one of us with dignity and strength. Girls, please understand that you are not an after thought. God made you with purpose in mind. He has a role specifically for you. You are the crown of His creation!

Women, made in the Image of God!

2010-07-16T12:28:00.001-07:00

I was so excited to start blogging. I feel like God has been teaching me so much but I just have been so busy to find time to write it down. I really need to make the time. I am excited for this season in my life. I am currently going through the Bible Study “Captivating, Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul” by John and Stasi Eldredge. Wow! Powerful Study! God has been showing me so much through it that much of what I will be blogging about in the next little while will probably be from “Captivating”. So hear we go…

Genesis 1:27

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”

I thought I understood this verse but really thinking about what being made in God’s image means is truly a new thing for me. When I look at God’s character and who He is I can see the masculine. The strength and power, the hero/warrior. And these aren’t the only masculine characteristics we see but a few that stick out to me. It has been easy for me to see God as that but what about women? Women were also made in God’s image. I have often thought that being feminine is weak but if women are truly made in God’s image how can that be? God isn’t weak. So God has been showing me that yes men are made in His image but so are women. He designed us very differently but both in His image. And both very important to Him!

Whatever it means to bear God’s image, women do so as women. Female! That’s how and where women bear his image. My feminine heart was created to reflect God’s own heart. This has been profound for me. I’ve never looked at this quite this way before. Very eye opening! So I have begun this journey to discover what that means and of course that begins with the heart.

Through my study of “Captivating”, I have learned that there are three definite things that all women desire and long for: to be romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure, and to unveil beauty. These things make women come alive!

To be Romanced

I definitely want to share what God has been showing me about being romanced. It starts as little girls. I look at Londyn and watch how she plays. She wants to be the beautiful princess that is wanted and fought for. And her favorite movies, The Little Mermaid & Beauty and the Beast have that very theme in them. We see this in ALL “chick flicks”. I can think of my favorites =)

Little girls are like this with their daddy’s. I put a dress on Londyn and do her hair and she runs right into Daddy to make sure that He thinks she is absolutely beautiful. Twirling as she goes. She wants to hear him say, “Londyn you are so beautiful. Women want to be seen, pursued, the only one, to be someone’s priority. And the interesting thing to me about all of this is that God desires the exact same thing from us. He wants to be romanced. He wants us to pursue Him, to be captivated by Him, He wants to be our one and only. Wow! We (women) are much more like God than I thought. And this is just the beginning.

So for women, don’t be ashamed or embarrassed about a desire to be romanced. God has created us that way. He is that way! Know that you have been made in His image. You are not just a weak after thought. You are an important part of His plan. He loves you! He sees you and wants to pursue you.

An Irreplaceable Role in a Great Adventure

“There is something fierce in the heart of a woman. Simply insult her children, her man or her best friend and you’ll get a taste of it. A woman is a warrior too. But she is meant to be a warrior in a uniquely feminine way. Sometime before the sorrows of life did their best to kill it in us, most young women wanted to be a part of something grand, something important. Before doubt and accusation take hold, most little girls sense that they have a vital role to play; they want to believe there is something in them that is needed and needed desperately.” –Stasi Eldredge, “Captivating”

Women want to play and irreplaceable role. We love adventure and to play a huge part in that. Not that we want to do it on our own but something that requires us. Women do play an irreplaceable role everyday. Just look around you. And example of this, women give birth everyday. Women are not weak! Our bodies alone are very strong for this to happen. I believe that women were made this way and although men are strong in their own way they were definitely not made for having babies. Can I get an Amen from all the mommy’s? This is one irreplaceable role.

Some may want to hide and the thought of living as a hermit appeals to them. We have been disappointed, hurt, to many demands, completely worn out. But our lives were meant to be lived with others. We can’t run away for long. We are relational beings. Made to be that way. God is that way! He is relational. He longs to play that irreplaceable role in our lives and in the lives of all. He is irreplaceable! Every good and perfect gift comes from Him. The very breath we breathe is not possible without Him. And in the same way He has an irreplaceable role for each one of us, men and women. That is how we have been made, part of His design. I want to know what He has for me, don’t you?

Beauty to Unveil

And finally, women want to be beautiful. Beauty comes in many forms. I love the song by Bethany Dillon called “Beautiful”. In it she sings,

I want to be beautiful

And make you stand in awe

Look inside my heart

And be amazed

I want to hear you say

Who I am is quite enough

I just want to be worthy of love

And beautiful.

Wow! That is definitely me! I want to be beautiful don’t you? I love when Mario and I go out on dates. I always want to look beautiful to him. I dress up since most days I am dressed to clean and play with my precious kids. Putting on special perfume that I know drives him crazy. I love that!

I know this can be a very difficult struggle for most of us. We don’t feel like we are beautiful or at least not beautiful enough. We look around us and beauty is in our faces. How to get beautiful and how to look perfect, or at least how the world sees it. So many of us strive and others hide and resent that longing. And it isn’t always just outward beauty but inward beauty. We want to be beautiful on the inside, who we are. Queen Esther was beautiful but not just on the outside. Her good heart and love for her people are what move the King to save them. I want that to me. Look at Mother Teresa, she was absolutely beautiful. I’ve been praying God make me beautiful from the inside out. God let Londyn’s beauty come from the inside out and let her see that is most important.

“We want a beauty that can be seen; a beauty that can be felt; a beauty that affects others; and a beauty all our own to unveil. –Stasi Eldredge, “Captivating”. This is also God’s desire. He is absolutely beautiful! He wants it to be felt, to affect us, to unveil it. Wow! Were we ever made in His image or what? So don’t ever feel ashamed of this or wanting to be romanced and play that irreplaceable role. When God made us, He made us with these things in mind. He made us to be this way. Glorious, powerful and captivating!!!

I’m so excited to share more about what God is teaching me through the study I am doing. I totally recommend it to those who struggle like me and even those who feel strong. God has something for all of us!

Time to write it all down!!!

2010-06-11T22:24:00.000-07:00

I have decided that it is time for me to start writing down my thoughts, life lessons, the things that God has been laying on my heart. I don't want to forget them. I want to be able to look back and see all that I've learned and how I have changed. The growth!

Over the course of the past month or so I believe that Jesus has been speaking to me in such powerful ways. Through His Word, in Prayer, through others and even in dreams. It has been wonderful and yet quite overwhelming to think that God would speak to me this way. He really does love me so much! He has been showing me that He finds great delight and value in me even when I can't see it. That I am clothed with strength and dignity (Proverbs 31:25). He's been teaching me that despite all of my down falls and short comings that He makes everything beautiful in its time. He's so patient! That in my weakness He is strong. So with that I begin this new journey. Writing it all down. Hanging on all that He is showing me. Sharing it with you. I pray that you would come to know these things as well. You mean so much to Him!

He has bestowed on us a crown of beauty instead of ashes! (Isaiah 61:3)

Old Blog-Jan 2010

2010-06-11T22:16:00.000-07:00

A New Year/ A New Decade

Wow! I can't believe 2010 is here. It seems like yesterday that the year 2000 was upon us, with all the fear and excitement of the unknown. Ten years has gone so fast. So many major things have happened in my life in that time. Precious things that I am so grateful for and have changed me for the better! And now we look ahead to a New Year and a New Decade. JESUS, what is it that you have for us? What an exciting thought and prayer to have. I am so glad that our hope is found in Him.

Mario and I have been doing a study together on Proverbs. Our hearts desire for us and for our children is to know Him more, to have the wisdom and knowledge that the Proverbs talks about, to embrace and live it out in our lives. So often we find ourselves trying to get through life loving God yes, but leaning on our own understanding. Handling what life brings, our way. But I know that God's way is so much better and rich.

Proverbs 4:7-9 says, "Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Esteem her, and she will honor you. She will set a garland to grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor."

Proverbs wisdom is found only in God. We are learning in our study that God gives many things with an open hand. He lets the sun rise on the just and the unjust and gives rain to all. He gives life to all even for those who do not acknowledge Him. He gives wonderful gifts to all even to those who will never say thank you. And yet when it comes to knowing Him, having that knowledge and wisdom, He holds that with a closed hand. We have to go to Him and get it. That is the only way!

Proverbs 4:5 says, "Get wisdom, get understanding..."

I'm thankful God is relational and desires us to come to Him. And that when we do, He is so willing to give.

Old Blog-June 2009

2010-06-11T22:15:00.000-07:00

3 Rainbows-The Awesomeness of God

I often find myself in Awe of the beautiful creation around me. I think it is such an amazing display of God’s Majesty and Power. Sometimes it takes my breath away. There are a few things about creation that are my favorite of course. A child being born (especially my own) is number one. Hearing that first cry and seeing them for the first time. Wow it is amazing! A few of my absolute favorites are the vast Ocean, the mighty Mountains, the beauty of flowers, all the many different and unique animals and Rainbows.

This past week or more Utah has been a very wet place to be. It has rained and rained and poured. Londy and I keep wondering if we will ever have summer and be able to go swim in our pool. There has also been a bunch of lightning and thunder, another one of God’s great displays of His Awesomeness. This past Thursday we were leaving a wedding rehearsal and it was just pouring outside and yet the sun was shining so brightly. As we walked very quickly to the car Londyn started screaming. She wasn’t screaming because she was hurt at all but because she could see a rainbow. In fact, it wasn’t just one rainbow or two rainbows but three rainbows. Wow, it was awesome! The next thing that came from our little girl’s mouth was “Thank you God!” And you should’ve just seen her face, she was absolutely awestruck. She then went on to say in her own cute little way, “I can’t even besplain (explain) this.” It was also the very first time Brayden had seen a rainbow so he was just as excited. For twenty minutes or so we watched as we drove from Bountiful to Taylorsville where we live. It was so awesome and I was praising God all the way home not only for one rainbow but three rainbows and that my kids and I got a chance to see it. I was also praising God for their reactions because I knew that they got to see one of the Wonders of God and they were amazed by it.

As a little girl I remember sitting on the grass in my back yard in the pouring rain every time there was a rainbow and just thinking Wow Awesome! At that time I didn’t really know God but I see now that God was Wooing me. That He was showing me just a little piece of who He was. I pray that as each of you go through life that you would look around and see God. And not only see Him but know Him. You see rainbows are not just a display of God’s awesomeness but a reminder of His promises, His faithfulness and His love for all of us.

Old Blog-Nov 2008

2010-06-11T22:13:00.000-07:00

What I believe Christians should know about this election

So today is Election Day and most people have already voted or will be making their way to the polls. To be honest, I’m so glad that this day has finally arrived and is almost over with all the messy political-talk going on. I have been really praying about how to vote these past few months. I’ll be honest, as a Christian, I’ve been quite surprised about a few things. Not so much by what the candidates are saying, but by what God’s people are saying and their own take on things. I really believe that most Christians in our area (the West) actually believe that Jesus must be Republican, and if you are a Christian, then you are automatically Republican. That grieves me. Although I know that it is important for us to vote, I think we need to be very careful because the political system we have in America, (and this includes both parties) is flawed. As Christians we need to pray about the issues and let God speak to us.

If you are putting your hope in McCain and think that he is going to save our country from immorality or evil, you are so mistaken. The days are evil but we, as Christians shouldn’t be surprised by any of it. God has told us these days were coming. It has nothing to do with our political system but the condition of people’s hearts. If you are putting your hope in Obama and think he is going to change everything and make all the mess go away, you are mistaken as well. We will be dealing with this mess for a very long time. God needs to be where we place our hope and trust.

We also need to remember that no matter whom our next president, God will still be God. I have found that many Christians are absolutely terrified that if Obama becomes president that we are doomed. Come on, read the Old Testament and what God’s people, the Israelites went through. Over and over again, they were under very tough and ungodly rule. In Jeremiah, God let Babylonians come in, strip the Israelites from their home, and take them to Babylon to rule over them. Those were rough times. But God reminded them that He still was their God and if they were obedient to Him, even as they were in Babylon, He would be with them and save them. Even in Jesus lifetime, the people were under a Roman occupation and rule. Yet we see that Jesus wasn’t caught up in trying to over throw the Romans. Why? Because his kingdom is not of this world and neither is our citizenship. Might I add, Obama is not the anti-Christ!

So what do we need to do as God’s people? Pray, Pray, Pray! Vote, but do so only prayerfully. Not only for president, might I add, but in all areas of government. We need to stop being so political or “republican” and be followers of Christ. (It’s also true that we shouldn’t be so “democrat” either. I don’t want anyone assuming this is a political rant). We need to pray that God would move in hearts all over America because He will save them from sin and give them the hope and change they are searching for. As God’s people, we need to put our trust and hope in Him alone, knowing that ultimately God is ruler over all. And no matter what the outcome of this election might be, let’s continue to follow after God and be a light to a lost world. Oh, and remember: This is not our home, our citizenship is in heaven and we eagerly await our Savior from there!

Old Blog-Oct 2008

2010-06-11T22:11:00.000-07:00

Awestruck!

So yesterday, our family took a drive up to the mountains to enjoy the fall beauty. It is truly amazing up there! And although I’ve been up there many times, I am still awestruck with the majestic Rocky Mountains and beautiful landscape (especially with all the bright color up there right now). I guess what amazes me even more is that God would make all of this for our enjoyment. That He had us in mind while He was creating all of it, is humbling. That is really something to think about. And it is not just the mountains! It is the ocean, lakes, sunsets, the star-filled sky, rainbows, flowers, birds and the endless list goes on and on. Wow! I am so grateful for all of this.

I know that we can get very busy with everyday life and forget all of this or not take the time to really look around and enjoy our surroundings. You know, the other day I was driving in the car with worship music playing and Londyn asked me, “Mom, when the song says ‘God you amaze me’, what does that mean?” Through her question I was able to explain how awesome God is. That He makes the sun rise every morning, He provides all that we need, He gives us breath and life, He loves us like know one else and He has made all that is good. It was a real privilege to be able to share those things with her. But the best part was her reaction. She got it. She sat there in her seat and said, “Wow! That is so cool!”

Yesterday, as we were hiking, the wind started blowing the quakies and hundreds of those bright yellow leaves began to rain down all around us. I watched my kids faces just light up and they started squealing in excitement. I was thinking no wonder God says we need to be like little children. They get it. We can learn so much from them.

All this to say, I need to take time to stop what I am doing (even if it just for a few moments) and really enjoy what God has made. To be amazed of His beautiful creation, awestruck because when that happens it makes me stand more and more in awe of Him. I encourage you to do the same. Become like a little child. Enjoy!

Old Blog-Sept 2008

2010-06-11T22:10:00.000-07:00

Who does God speak to?

A few weeks ago I had quite a few questions I needed answers for. Questions that I needed God to answer. Questions about what God really thinks about certain things that go on in life. And what I didn’t want was someone’s opinion or the Christian answer; I wanted to really hear from God myself. So I just began to ask and seek. Being really honest with God about these issues I was wondering about. I’ll come back to this in just a moment.

Now I would like to fast forward to last Saturday. I was at a home group and someone started talking about those who hear from God and so I was really interested. He said that there are certain people that hear directly from the Lord just like they are talking to him on a phone that reaches up to heaven. These people hear and talk to God all the time and they are so incredible. Pretty much he was saying they are modern day prophets and that he knew many of them and it is so awesome that God speaks to them. As I sat there, a few things struck me, first, this gentleman was looking at it all wrong and he is really missing it. God can and will speak to people and some more that others but it isn’t because those people are better or because God wants to speak to them more. God wants to speak to everyone but in order for that communication to take place it needs to come from both ways. These people who “hear from God” take time to converse, ask and listen to Him. And the great thing about God is He is really creative in how He does things, so when He does speak to us He does it in many different ways. He does it in a way that you and I can know that it is Him speaking.

So back to the questions I had, yes, God did answer my questions in a powerful way. He spoke to me during my prayer time, He backs it up with His Word and He even confirmed it through people I don’t know. How awesome is that. And next time I have questions, most likely He’ll speak to me much differently. So be encouraged and know that if you need to hear from Him that He will speak to you just ask.

“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” James 1:5